Back still bad – but feeling more positive
Really enjoyed last nights session – cant believe it is the last week next week
Sandie comments really made sense yesterday – there are 8 other tools I can concentrate on until I can exercise again
I was getting obsessed as I cant do it now
Yes the duck is telling me I am a failure as I must be the only person to put on weight on this programme
I keep forgetting it has been about far more than weight for me
Actually now my mind is clearer
I have always drunk the water anyway – rarely do on weekends
I have not been snacking anymore other than fruit
We rarely eat processed food – once a month
Last week realised we had not had pasta in weeks – we used to eat that 3 times a week
I rarely have panic attacks & they are mild when I do now
I cant remember the last time I binged
I need more practice at
Relaxing
Eating slowly
Being kind to myself
I have just treat the last few months as a long wobble – not give up like the duck is telling me to
I have been to the docs again today, she said my back still looks very swollen
Now my shoulder hurts too – where I have been walking stiff I guess
Different pain killers more to get the inflammation down
She said not to lift anything heavy for 6 weeks
Holiday is in 8 weeks
I am going to see if I can get on a yoga class – I did not really enjoy pilates few months ago as the teacher did not really explain anything as I was the only new one there
Busy weekend this weekend – 3 BBQ's
2BBQ to go to sat, I will not each much at the lunchtime one
Family BBQ at the inlaws, taking my dad & wife
The BBQ last year I was a nervous wreck that my dad would get drunk & embaress me in front of the inlaws
Still a bit nervous, but who cares- hubby is used to my dad after 13yrs with me
I watched living with size zero last nite – I was in tears – that's what I put my family through
You are just in your own world
To be honest I am glad I had bulimia then & not now as with all the websites she was looking at to help with tips on hiding it
We did not have the internet at home, thank god
You think when you are unhappy that being slim will make you happy
Her waist was 23inches – my thighs are like 25inches each
What was interesting was her fiancée saying she was perfect at a size 12
Tonight I am going back over the tools & going to use the daily checker rather than deleting the email
I went through a period of wondering how I could legitimately comment on any blogs as I felt like I was stuck in a plateau, I hadn't really lost much weight and therefore how could I make any suggestions to anyone.
I realised that interestingly for a weight loss programme, weight loss is sometimes only a peripheral part of the experience. I have realised that sometimes you need to focus on the bigger picture. For me, I needed to become more healthy in mind and body to help me lose weight. This time last year I had damaged my knee - if I am honest, I could be maverick about my exercise in that I didn't balance my exercise programme and therefore it put too much pressure on my knee which caused it to give way. I was exhausted. I had a chest infection every 6 weeks which meant my exercise programme was erratic and eating habits could be equally erratic. I lost a little weight last year and dropped a dress size but then hit a plateau.
This year I have tried the nutritional programme and really noticed the benefits. I am doing pilates three times a week for relaxation. I listen to my body and my knee and my exercise programme is balanced. I have dropped 2 more dress sizes since January. I suspect dropping dress sizes is linked to focusing more on being healthy than slim.
And I still refuse to weigh myself - I ended up at a weightloss class this week as spinning was cancelled and I was the only one who wasn't weighed - I prefer to evaluate my progress by other markers.
I really hope you feel better soon. I really identify with how you feel but I am so impressed with what you have achieved = please don't forget those achievements.